Fill My Cup Lord (day 3)

This post is dedicated to a dear friend and teacher affectionately known as Mama Jean.  The teachings of this 91-year old lady over the course of last year inspired today's writings.  Many of these ideas were things she taught and many others are things I learned as a result of her teaching.  May the Lord bless you with many more years of teaching, Mama Jean!

One of my favorite days of the week is Thursday because at our house, Thursday morning means Morning Grace.  Georgia and Amber go to a nursery class and play with other little ones their age.  Gracie goes to her homeschool class and learns lots of wonderful things under the care and watch of Ms. Lovey.  Ross is also in a homeschool class learning about the book of Leviticus and the customs and ceremonies of the Israelite priests with Mrs. Ashe.  And I get a few hours reprieve from being wife and mom to just be a daughter of God, refreshing my spirit, worshipping my Savior and learning how to have a closer walk with Him.

Mama Jean has been my teacher at Morning Grace for most of the time I've been there. Last year she taught a class called "Fill My Cup Lord". Using a teacup or coffee mug as a symbol of our hearts, we talked about all the things that we in our cups that prevented us from being filled with all God had for us - a heart full of bitterness or unforgiveness or anger or fear, stains in our cups that represented past sins we had not confessed, cracks and chips representing hurts and trials we had been through. Sometimes our hearts are shattered and God has to form a new cup, molding and shaping us through the trail into something even more like His image. Once our cups are empty of ourselves, there is room for God to fill us with more of Him. We can have joy overflowing, peace that passes understanding, strength for each new day.

As we discussed these things in our class, I thought of my teacup collection at home. My mama started buying me Old Country Roses teacups, saucers and other matching dishes when Ross was born. My demitasse teacups are very small and delicate. They are very beautiful to look at and look lovely on my table set for tea, but most people are hesitant to use them because they are afraid they might break.

When I first became a Christian, my "cup" (my heart) was a lot like that demitasse teacup. It was pretty to look at and others were impressed by it - "Oh you are such a good Christian lady" - but it was delicate and easily broken. The first little trial I faced left it chipped and cracked and not as pretty as it had once been. It was also small and with so much of me still filling the cup, there was not much room for God to lead and direct me. He needed more of me than a little demitasse teacup could hold. And so He broke me - not because I was not good enough, but because He loved me enough to make me something better, something He could use in a mightier way. Through many years of teaching and guiding and disciplining me, through many trials and hurts and disappointments, my cup has changed.

Today my cup better resembles an old stoneware coffee mug. It's nothing pretty to look at, but I'm less concerned now with how others see me and more concerned about how God sees me. It's not as delicate as before, but its strength makes it easier to walk through the storms of life. The biggest change though is in its size. The tiny little teacup has been replaced by a cup that is deep and wide, able to be filled with the things God has for me. My Christianity is no longer something to occasionally put on display in order to impress others. It is a faith that I live out everyday.


What does your cup look like? Whether your heart resembles a delicate teacup or a sturdy coffee mug, we can all be used by God if we will surrender to Him. All He asks is that we allow Him to fill our cup.

Learn Something New Everyday (day 2)

"And do not be conformed to this world,

but be transformed by the renewing of your mind" Romans 12:2

It's no secret that I'm a homeschooling mama.  My days are typically filled with workbooks, science experiments and art projects.  I'm always looking for ways to make learning fun for my children.  I want them to love to learn and to continue learning into adulthood.

I remember as a teenager counting down the days when I would be finished with school and learning.  One day, I thought, I'll be an adult in the real world and there will be no more reading and memorizing and testing what I know!  Little did I know then, learning is a lifetime experience.  Every day is a new opportunity to discover something, to gain a new skill, to learn!  The question is, are you seizing the opportunity?

One of the greatest unexpected benefits of homeschooling my children has been rediscovering my own joy of learning.  Together we immerse ourselves in the history of our country, the creation of our planet, the structure of our language.  And I find myself often saying, "I didn't know that!"  In addition to the new things I'm learning as I teach my children, I'm making it a priority to learn new things for myself.  Some things I've learned have helped me to manage my house better, like making homemade baby food and laundry detergent, planting a garden for the first time, taking up the challenge of perfecting lemon pound cake or painting our bathroom.  Other things I've learned have helped me to be a better teacher by helping me to understand learning styles, giving me new ideas for organizing lesson plans or introducing me to a new method of homeschooling.  In my own personal interests, I've learned to quilt and am constantly reading a new Bible study or book meant to teach and encourage wives, mothers or women in general.  Since starting this blog I've learned how to set up a website template, how to insert "click here" to lead people to a different web address without typing it out and today I learned how to set up a Facebook page for my blog and then set up the blog to allow readers to "become a fan".

All around us are new avenues waiting to be explored, new worlds we have yet to know, if only we will take the time to pursue them. So what's stopping you?  Make it a priority to learn something new everyday.  Get excited about learning again.  Who knows, you might discover a hidden talent or find a wonderful new hobby.

What have you learned recently?  Are you in the process of learning something new right now?  Be sure to leave a comment and share it with us!

The 30 Challenge

For as long as I can remember, I've loved to write.  I have poetry books I wrote in elementary school that my parents saved for me.  I have a file in my desk drawer of devotionals and other writings, some that have been published on various websites.  I've been paid to write on a few occasions.  I even have a magazine and a book on my bookshelf, both containing published writing with my name on it.  So it was only natural for me to begin to write a blog.  My blog gives me a chance to share with others what God is doing in my life and gives a glimpse of our family's adventures in parenting, homeschooling and whatever else I've dreamed up for us to do.  Writing is an outlet for me - a great stress reliever - but lately it has been something that is at the bottom of my priority list.  When I do get a chance to write, I feel almost like I'm talking to myself on the blog.  I don't have many followers and I don't get many comments.  This discourages me from writing more often and so the cycle continues.

And so, I am presenting myself with a challenge - 30 posts in 30 days with 30 followers and 30 comments.  Beginning today and running through May 5th, I am commiting to writing on my blog each day.  I am also going to promote my blog to as many people as possible and make a goal of having 30 followers at the end of the 30 days.  I currently have 4 - thank you to my followers!!  AND, so I don't feel like I'm talking to myself, I am going to encourage more comments so that by the end of the 30 days, I have at least 30 new comments on my blog.  My hope is that by the end of the 30 days, I will feel energized to continue writing more often.  The big dream is that I will once again be able to write for a paycheck and contribute to our family budget.

So whether you've enjoyed my blog in the past, or you've just found my blog, and you like what you see, please become a follower! This will alert you to new blog posts automatically.  Tell your friends to check it out too!  Follow along and see how I do in the next 30 days.  And as always, comments are welcome!

Lessons from "Little House in the Big Woods" (day 1)

Today the girls and I sat down and read a chapter from "Little House in the Big Woods".  I have always intended to read through as many of the books in the Little House series as possible with the girls, but time and other commitments have kept me from it.  At Gracie's urgings, we finally sat down today and began to read.  We had actually started this book some time over the summer so instead of starting at the beginning, we simply picked up where we left off.

First we read about Laura and Mary helping Ma with the chores through the week.  Each day Ma would have a different chore she would focus on.  We reviewed the days of the week and talked about routines in our house.  The book described in great detail how Ma would churn the butter and how she used carrot in the winter to make the butter yellow so it would look pretty.  The girls were fascinated that you could make butter by yourself so we decided to try it.  I poured some heavy cream into a mason jar and screwed the lid on tight.  We took turns shaking it until it became so thick it wouldn't shake anymore.  Then we took off the lid and sampled our creation.  We all agreed that as yummy as our butter was, it was a lot of work and we are thankful we can go buy ours at the store!

After chores, Ma would sometimes cut out paper dolls and bits of colored paper.  Then Mary and Laura would sit together and dress the dolls and pretend.  So I found a set of paper dolls online, printed them out (complete with several outfits and hairdos) and we started coloring them and cutting them out.  Now they each have a paper doll and lots of clothes to dress it with, just like Mary and Laura.

At the end of the chapter, Pa told the girls a story about Grandpa and the panther.  We talked a little bit about panthers and that was the end of our lesson (and their attention spans).  We are all looking forward to reading together again tomorrow!

Best Laid Plans of Mice and Men

March is a peculiar time of year for our family as homeschoolers.  At this point in the school year, I find myself looking back at what each child has learned, how much curriculum we've covered and what he/she has accomplished.  I also look ahead and make goals for the coming school year and plans for summer break.  I breathe a sigh of relief that the long winter cooped up indoors with rambunctious children is finally giving way to the warm weather and the chance to burn up energy running and playing outdoors out from underneath Mama's feet.  It's a time of year in which I constantly find myself looking behind and ahead, but often missing the present moment and enjoying what it has to offer or teach me.

It reminds me of the poem "To a Mouse, on Turning Her Up in Her Nest, with the Plough" by Robert Burns.  Burns is a Scottsman from 1785.  He wrote the poem, as the title suggests, when he was plowing his fields and inadvertently overturned a mouse's winter nest in the process.  Toward the end of the poem is the famous line: "The best laid schemes of mice and men go often askew, and leave us nothing but grief and pain, for promised joy!"  In other words, no matter how well we plan, sometimes we can destroy the plans of others by our actions.  The poet observed that the mouse was the lucky one, as he lived in the moment, while the poet was looking to sad events of the past and the uncertainty of the future and was unable to enjoy the present.  You can read the poem and an excellent explanation of the meaning behind it here.

This poem challenges me in this peculiar season of homeschooling.  As I look back on our accomplishments in this school year (and our shortcomings!) and plan new goals for the coming months, I am purposing to stay in the moment.  I don't want to miss the wonder on Glorie's face when she watches the mockingbird carrying a stick to its nest.  I want to enjoy the pride on Grace's face when she recognizes a word and can read it to me.  I will be there to cheer Georgia on as she begins to crawl across the floor.  I plan to celebrate with Gilbert when he finishes his first long novel.

There is a time and a purpose in reviewing where I've been and planning for where I am going.  I intend to enjoy the journey along the way!

Open Doors

The past few weeks have been filled with faith and promise.  As you know, Michael and I are licensed foster parents.  We have not had a placement in almost three years.  However, we have been very busy with two new babies, an ill grandmother, homeschooling and just life in general!  Recently Michael and I spent a day alone together and talked about where we want to go from here as a family.  Eventually foster care came into the conversation and we decided to begin praying for God to direct us as to where to go next, or whether to go anywhere at all - perhaps God has finished our work in this area!  And so we began to pray.

First we prayed for God's provision.  We needed a bed for a child to sleep in and clothes for him to wear.  (Yes HIM - we have as many girls as we can hold in our little house!)  So we prayed and we waited.  A week later, God provided a loft bed and mattress through Freecycle.  We saw this as confirmation that God wanted us to continue with foster care and continued to wait on Him to provide.

It's been a few weeks longer now and we continue to see God pave the way before us.  I found a large bag of boy's clothes in the attic that I was sure I had given away.  We were invited to a DSS sponsored function that normally we would have never heard about.  All around us we see confirmations from God, leading us and showing us the way, even if it is just the next step.

And so we stand before an open door.  Our hearts are full of excitement and anticipation as we imagine what God may have in store for us beyond this door.  Will we begin fostering again?  Does God have a child in mind that will become a permanent part of our family? Or is He planning to continue to use us to minister to those actively fostering? 

If I am honest, there is also a feeling of inadequacy and wondering at the unknowns.  How do we add yet another child when our schedule (and our home) already seems to be bursting at the seams?  How would another child in our home (temporary or permanent) affect our children?  I need so much grace and patience from my Heavenly Father every day just to love and nurture and teach and mold the lives of the four beautiful children He's given us. How much more grace and patience will I need if we add another child to the picture?  Are we crazy to even be considering this?!?  What about school? And clothes? And time for each child?  How will we find him? How will he respond to us? What if this is not the beginning of another journey for us but the end of a journey we've been on the past four years? Am I ready to close the door and leave this ministry behind if that's what God calls me to do?

I am very aware of my dependence on God to care for my children in a way that honors Him and even more aware of how much more I will need Him if we expand our hearts to include another child.  I see so many areas of my life that need major work and change, so many weaknesses.  I do not know how the details will work out.  But there are things that I know to be true.  Praise God that He is faithful!  His grace is more than enough, it will never run out.  His mercies are new every morning.  He will bring to completion that which He calls us to do.

I do not know what lies beyond this open door, where it will take us, how long it will be before we walk through it.  This I know, and this truth sustains me - God is here with me on this side of the door and He will be with me every step of the way beyond it.  I don't know what the future holds but I know Who holds my future and I am putting my trust in Him.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths." Proverbs 3:5-6

Old is New Again in 2010

In my last post I shared with you my dream for transforming my modern day cookie cutter suburban home into an old fashioned farmhouse that looks like it's been here for 100 years.  I also gave my home a name, Gentility.

Now that we have a focus here at Gentility the work can begin!  First on the agenda is a major PURGE!  I realized as I put away my everyday living room decor to make room for Christmas decorations that most of what is on display in my home is not meaningful to me.  It's just there because it's always been there.  So as I pack up the Christmas decorations, keeping only what I LOVE of course, I will also only return decor to the living room that is meaningful to me.  Our church is having a fundraising yard sale in a few weeks so this will be my motivation to work quickly, purge the clutter from Gentility and help a good cause at the same time!

I also shared in my last post my love of things with a soul.  I received a few wonderful gifts this Christmas to add to Gentility that definitely have a soul and a story to tell.  I received an old family photo, an old print to hang on the wall and a china platter.  The stories of these pieces will be shared as I find homes for them here at Gentility.  For now they have been tucked away so escape the great purge!

Once the purge is complete, the redecorating will begin!  I will be doing most of the work myself with occasional assistance from my sweet husband or my children.  I am excited to see the new face of Gentility.  Won't you come along with me for the journey?  Stay tuned for pictures to show our progress.